Sexual Racism / Gay Asian Male (GAM) pages

Since about 2002, I've been raising the issue of sexual racism on the internet, and I discovered that others were as well. So, we've joined forces, aiming to raise discussion on the issue, and to make the internet, and maybe by extension, the gay community, a safer and friendlier place for everyone, no matter what colour you are.

The use of internet services for dating and meeting up with other men has gone up and up and UP. Places like gaydar.com.au or gay.com or aol.com or any of these gay profile sites may be the most powerful force shaping gay male sexuality today. They are certainly among the most important ways we meet each other and talk about who we are.

Along with the rise of these services (which stretch beyond national borders to a truly international meeting place and phenomenon) have arisen new forms of old prejudices. This is the issue we want to address and it relates to these phrases:

We're calling this: "sexual racism".

Some people relate racism only to the Ku Klux Klan and white supremacist groups. They think that racism is only when you hate other races or when you think your race is superior. But racism is also about prejudice based on race. It often involves the first definitions but is much more subtle.

Since I'm assuming that most everyone who is reading this is gay, I ask you to think of your own experience of being gay. It didn't take people to actively hate me in order for me to feel uncomfortable. It could just have been their discomfort or distaste. And I don't think any straight person ever told me that they were superior to me - but I did feel marginalized for not having the same equal rights. So, just as homophobia and heterosexism need not be blatant to be harmful, it's the same with racism.

If you're surfing the internet looking for friends, or dates, or shags, and you read profile after profiile that excludes you on the basis of something you have no control over - race - , how does it make you feel? No GAMS is only one letter away from No GAYS. Think of it that way. How about if you walk around in your workplace or your neighbourhood and occasionally, or more often than you think, you see a sign that says "No Gays."

We know that prejudices don't go away easily so while we hope to make people think, the prime aim of this campaign is practical and concrete. What we're working towards is eliminating language from public space that makes gay internet sites unfriendly and unwelcoming to not only Asian men, but to other men who are different. We recommend that men word their ads positively, to specify who or what we're looking for, rather than who or what we're not looking for, i.e. looking for slim guys, rather than "no fats."

It's become so easy and so common in Sydney (and some other places) for men to write the terms -No Asians, No GAMs, No Gay Asians - in their profiles. I hope that gay asian guys who use the internet for dating and meeting people, as well as our friends and supporters will join in a campaign to get these phrases out of public spaces where they create an environment where the people think it is acceptable and where it is hurtful to those who encounter it.

This campaign is specifically aimed at those who use these services. While you may support these issues, I certainly don't expect you to trawl the internet for sexual racism to respond to! But for those who do use the services, and run across this language on a regular basis, why don't we do something about it?

This is a complicated issue. We don't want to make it seem easy. That's why we're encouraging discussion. Check out the other writing on the site, and the Sexual Racism Sux site. Tell us your comments.

I think that we as gay men have experienced enough prejudice to understand a bit about it. Why add to it? Why don't we all work towards something called a "community" chock-full of respect, responsibility and kindness?

Chop Suey
writing and stuff

Since my last update on these pages was Sept 2003, I'm not doing a good job of keeping things up-to-date. But I'm putting a few new pieces up so have a read!

Personal-ad activists won't swallow racism (Aug 2006)
A feature article in the Georgia Straight, Vancouver's weekly entertainment newspaper, by Craig Takeuchi.

Questions and Answers (updated Oct 2005)
A few questions and answers about the campaign , a mild political manifesto and a teeny disclaimer.

Questions and Answers (updated Oct 2005)
A few questions and answers about the campaign , a mild political manifesto and a teeny disclaimer.

New Stereotypes for a New Century (Feb 2005)
In Feb 05, I wrote an article for http://www.fridae.com, the Asian gay and lesbian news portal and personal ad site. It was in response to an article about racism against Asian men in the gay community which I thought was both outdated and unhelpful.

It created an unbelievable amount of response. You have to be a member of fridae to read them - (and someone said it took him two hours to do so). I found it difficult to read since there were a lot of personal attacks on me and misinterpretations of the article, but it is a fascinating snap shot of white-asian gay relationships - and around the world, where this website focuses on Western cities.

Sexual racism or discernment (Oct 2005)
This is a response that Tim has made to a posting on the sexualracismsux yahoo list. It deals with a lot of issues but I think it's a good illustration of both some common negative responses to the campaign, and how complex it is to respond to them. Though Tim does a damn fine job.

The Form Letters (April 2003)
Show someone you care! Well, show someone that you've noticed their ad is worded (perhaps unintentionally) in way that is unnecessarily hurtful. We've found that webmasters and companies don't want to take up this issue, so it's really up to us. Back to the grassroots. On this page, you'll find a few model letters you can use. You can just cut and paste it into a message from you. I'm going to try and work out a form so you can just enter their address and it will automatically send it to them.

Nastiness about being HIV Positive (April 2003)
While the focus on this website is racism on the net, there's also some nasty shit on the web re: HIV status. I quite liked this response (link posted with permission)

I don't have a racist bone in my body (December 2001)
I wrote this article for the magazine CRANK about internet racism. It was my first attempt to put my thoughts down on the issue, and I'm happy with the way it turned out.

Getting It If You're Asian (Spring 2002)
I wrote this piece for RICEPAPER magazine's "the SEX [-y/ual/ualized] issue" published in Spring 2002. It's about being Asian (man, woman, gay, straight or bi) and getting it. Wink wink. Nudge Nudge.

Kinds of Racism (April 2003)
Asian men who say "no whites". Whites that say "Asians only". HIV Positive men who are looking for other Pos guys. More thoughts about preferences and prejudices.

Advice to an Advice Columnist (April 2003)
More on personal ads and race. Dan Savage wrote a reply to a reader who'd written in on this issue. I think his advice needs some advice.

Responses to the Campaign
We've had lots of good responses, and a few negative ones to this campaign. We keep 'em at the sexual racism sux site.

Links

Sexual Racism Sux!
This is my inspiration. My pal Tim (well, now he's a pal, I didn't know him when he did this) noticed these No Asian ads and decided to start a little campaign using his website. Through it, you can put a stylish banner on your personal ad that says "Sexual Racism Sux". It has a list of supporters, an explanation of why sexual racism sux, and is just generally an all-around cool place to hang out. Tim is hosting these page on his website too. I encourage you to spread the word about this and get people of all races to join the campaign!

SRS Yahoo Groups
Join the discussion. As of October 2005, about 250 members!

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